GIRLS: DRAMA & RUMORS
Hi, it's been a while. I started grade seven in a new school last September and have been super busy adjusting, learning and making new friends. It’s been challenging to keep up my good grades. New school, new teachers, new rules… lots that has been keeping me very busy, but that is not what my blog post is about today. I thought we could talk about SCHOOL DRAMA.
Is it just me, or have you also noticed that girls for whatever reason seem to have more drama among themselves, than boys? Why is it that girlfriends especially in middle school (I don’t know what it’s like in high school yet) seem to like the drama, and have a harder time being honest to each other? There are always one or two friends, that cause drama sometimes on purpose, and sometimes maybe without even knowing. Sometimes drama happens because of misunderstandings, and I wonder, why can we just not be more honest to each other?
Rumors are constantly spreading, whether it's about best friends getting into a huge fight, a girl in your class that just got new shoes, two close friends having a crush on the same boy, or anything else. Why is it so easy to get caught up in rumors?
Yes, I have to admit that some of the drama I have watched or even been part of can be quite entertaining, at least for those who are not directly involved. Let me tell you one thing, it doesn’t pay off in the end. See the thing that i don't understand is that people can make the smallest most insignificant things, like a girl/boy getting new shoes, the biggest scandal ever. “What??? Shoes??? What is she talking about???” You are probably asking yourself right now. I know right? Seems ridiculous.
Maybe, someone else just got the same shoes and doesn’t like the fact that now this person has the same exact shoes. They start arguing, the entire class ends up getting involved, and people start choosing sides, because they feel they have to. Then the entire peer pressure starts becoming a thing, everyone thinks about their own reputation, because people want to make sure you are choosing the “right, cool” side. Reputation is a huge thing now in middle school, and can lead us to sometimes forgetting about kindness, and just going for what we think will make us popular.
Have you ever been in that situation, where you were either caught in the drama, or you felt like you had to choose between friends?
I have learned that staying true to yourself and going with what you think is right, works out at the end. I have been involved in drama, I think all of us go through this. In the process I have gotten hurt many times, but at the same time, I have also made mistakes and hurt others. Sometimes I think we should be more honest to each other. I know now that I should have spoken up more in the past and told my friends how I felt. I mean really, how else are they going to know otherwise that something bothers you, or that something is up. There have been times when friends would think that I had talked behind their back, and would just stop talking to me because someone had spread that rumor. I had no idea what was going on, and would always wonder what I had done. For a while I wouldn’t say anything, because I was too shy or because I was afraid to do something wrong, or to be rejected. I still keep quiet sometimes, but I am trying to get better at it and to have the confidence to speak up and talk things out. I don’t want to give too much away and I don’t want to get hurt. I still feel that it’s an impossible balance act to know how much you can say, and actually being understood. Girls tend to make drama out of the smallest things.
Not so long ago. A friend of mine thought that I was ignoring her, but I wasn’t. Part of having ADHD means that I am spaced out at times and not aware of my surroundings. That means that I can be talking with one or two friends, and if another person is coming by, I will literally not notice him/her. My friend was hurt, since she thought I was purposefully ignoring her, so there was a bit of drama, but we talked it out, and she understood. That made me very happy.
At the end of the day my definition of a true friend is someone that you can be yourself with. Someone that accepts you for who you are and tells you the truth to your face, or at least doesn’t talk behind your back. Someone that will stick to you no matter what, and someone you can trust. Sometimes you like them a bit more and sometimes a bit less, you will have arguments because we all have good and bad days, but overall you love them and you want them around you. I would like to think that true friends are there to support each other.
I know it can be difficult to completely stay away from the “TOP” drama in your class or school, and I guess it’s part of our every day at school, but before you do get involved somehow, always ask yourself: “ Is someone getting hurt? Do I really want to get involved in this?” Just remember to find your courage to make the kind choice.